What Makes Someone Irresistible?

You’ll recognize these traits in them.

James Michael Sama
9 min readDec 1, 2023


Je ne sais quoi: “A quality that cannot be described or named easily.” We’ve all met people who have it — that…thing that draws us to them, but we just cannot put our finger on what it is.

It’s a pull, a magnetism that makes you want to be in their presence. It doesn’t even have to be an intimate attraction, it’s just an energy that you enjoy being it. Perhaps it’s inspiring, or calming, or uplifting, or peaceful.

Whatever it is, you want more of it. You want to be around it more, and you want to learn how to exude it yourself so that you can live in that space as much as possible.

Irresistible people like this possess qualities, traits, and ways of living that draw us to them.

In this article, we’ll discuss some of these attributes to help you not only recognize more of these people to invite into your life — but to help you become one of them yourself.

1: They’re fully connected to the people and world around them.

Most of us are walking around sort of…half in, half out. We’re half paying attention, half looking at our phone. Half present, half wondering what we’re having for dinner. Half committed, half wondering what else is out there.

Sure, you think you’re doing a great job of hiding it…until you meet someone who is fully present in the moment. Someone who has no other interests besides what is immediately in front of them. Someone who’s inquisitive, who’s connected, who’s engaged with the people right in front of them.

The power of these people is that they make you feel seen, heard, and noticed. They’re not just smiling and nodding as you talk, but they’re actually absorbing what you say. They’re asking follow up questions. They’re right there, in the present moment, with you.

Those are people you remember.

Those are people who make everyone feel special.

Those are people that you want to be around all the time.

You’ll notice, too, when you stop dividing your attention and thoughts between multiple different stimuli at once, you’ll be able to slow down…



James Michael Sama

I help you evolve into the ultimate version of yourself. Life & Executive Coach. Multi #1 writer. Trusted by: CNN, CNBC, NY Post, CBS, more. Say hi! @JamesMSama